real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
The moment buddy the elf found out he was human is exactly like the moment I realized I was gay
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
