im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
Randomize