So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Randomize
