do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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