I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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