I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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