I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
Everclear isn't food dammit
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I have peed in a lot of sinks
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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