Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
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