I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
