it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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