You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize