Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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