whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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