where does the pee come out of this thing
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Also, beer. Big fan.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
