this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
