K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
Randomize
