We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
