I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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