she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize