pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
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