Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
