The maid of honor just puked.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Randomize
