Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Randomize
