would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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