Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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