He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
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