I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
