i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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