where am i from again
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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