You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
Randomize
