Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
This can only be settled by a dance off.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
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