she looked like the bat from fern gully.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Randomize
