so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
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