I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
