I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Went home with a guy last night with Taco Bell sauce in my hair and on my pants
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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