I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize