i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize