mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
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