When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
Randomize
