Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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