I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
