Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
