oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize
