In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
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