so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Randomize
