My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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