i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
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