That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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