I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
In America we eat man semen.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
