And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
