I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
